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After some heated debate, they settle on a vacation in Aspen. Soon after they decide, L notices an advertisement for special low airline fares to Bermuda. Nevertheless, the decision to go skiing has been made, and L cannot reopen the debate merely because of the lower airfare.
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To upset a one-time, relatively insignificant decision after exhaustive discussion would be unsettling and frustrating for both parties. Discovery; disclosure of evidence. Evidentiary questions pervade relationships. Few parties can transcend the ever-prevalent tension between the values of candid behavior and strategic posturing.
Some advocate use of an "open file" system, in which parties reveal without reservation their thoughts and feelings. The Restatement recognizes, however, that this course may lead to unfavorable results under certain circumstances. Parties are urged to consult precedent. A and B have been in a relationship for some time.
A feels that A is in love with B. A must decide whether to disclose freely these feelings, or whether making such an admission would leave A in a strategically vulnerable position. Property Parties may acquire various property rights in the course of a relationship, including affirmative easements for the use of personal possessions and rights of first refusal.
A party who regularly visits a romantic interest may acquire an affirmative easement in certain property. The burdened property may take the form of a shelf, a drawer, part of a closet, or an article of clothing. An easement may be created by any of the established methods, including express grant, necessity, estoppel, implication, or prescription.
These property rights create a potential for abuse, however. For example, one party may claim an easement that the holder of the servient tenement does not fully recognize or approve.
W and P are just starting a relationship. Two days later, P begins to write a term paper on W's computer. W is thereby deprived not only of the use of the computer, but also of the room in which P, P's books, and P's papers are now comfortably ensconced. P may argue that the grant was intended to extend to the use of the computer for related projects.
W may counter that only a limited easement was granted, and that P has exceeded its scope. W is estopped from denying the existence of an easement, however, because W granted P permission under circumstances in which it was reasonably foreseeable that P might take on larger projects believing that permission would not be revoked.
J and A have been involved in a relationship for several months. J lives in the city, and A works in the city but lives in the suburbs. A therefore cannot return home in the morning after a night at J's house without being late for work. Under these circumstances, A may acquire an easement by necessity for the use of J's closet to store clothes. C continually uses Q's walkman without Q's permission.
The use is known to many of their friends, and Q could have learned of it early on in the relationship through reasonable investigation. After a certain period of time, C has an easement by prescription, and Q cannot regain sole use of the item. Right of first refusal. The parties to a relationship owe each other rights of first refusal in almost all leisure activities.
Examples include invitations to parties; tickets to the theater, concerts, or sporting events; and vacation plans. V and W are in a new relationship. V has an upcoming break from school and hopes to take a vacation. V must ask W to join V before asking another friend.If You're In A Long Distance Relationship, Watch This
Torts Parties to a relationship are bound by the reasonable person standard, but only within reason. Parties owe each other a high duty of care. The very idea of love implies that both parties can be themselves, however unreasonable each may be. That is, each party is entitled to be an "eggshell plaintiff," and each must take his plaintiff as he finds him.
Despite the formalist view that a relationship is a haven for idiosyncratic behavior, parties cannot escape the notions of reasonableness that pervade society, and will advert to them when disputes arise. V and K have confessed their love for each other.
V indicates, however, that it is not in V's nature to speak the words "I love you" often. K has difficulty accepting that this is a mere idiosyncracy. K insists that it is reasonable to expect V to make regular references to V's emotions for K, just as K does for V.
Because parties to a relationship grow to know each other's idiosyncracies intimately, they are held to a high standard of care toward one another regarding these quirks. M knows that P hates to be coaxed or bullied out of a bad mood and prefers to sulk. P will reasonably expect M to leave P alone when P is in a funk, even though an outside observer would conclude that P is being unreasonable.
Sex is a watershed event in any relationship. When two parties desire each other, the unparalleled urge for gratification occupies the foreground, while issues of morality, childbirth, commitment, and death lurk in the background.
Although sex itself can yield unmatched pleasures, the clash of these broader concerns can bring on confusion or even anguish. The Parties' Decision To Have Sex Sexual intercourse is different from all other forms of sexual encounter, and once executed, cannot be revoked. Before engaging in sexual intercourse, parties should know their goals. Goals will be informed by the parties' status, that is, whether they are: Special status of sexual intercourse.
Sexual intercourse is different from other sexual acts. Sex, more than any other permutation of sexual activity, invokes powerful social norms and health concerns, and presents the additional possibility of pregnancy. The contention that sex is different, though facially simplistic, is consistent with the pervasive tendency in legal analysis to elevate certain acts, principles, or punishments to a higher significance. For example, the written Constitution has long been recognized as the binding law on the Union of the United States--different from and supreme over the general statutes and regulations.
If, however, the other party wishes to engage in sexual intercourse, the failure to reach a meeting of the minds may lead to protracted disputes. In this situation, the ready party may attempt to persuade using the well-worn "constructive sex" argument: C is anxious to have sex, and K is hesitant.
C contends, "You know we're having sex--what we're doing is sex. What's the difference if we have intercourse? C hopes that if K is unable to articulate why "sex is different," K will capitulate and have sex with C.
The constructive sex argument is seductive, but for the reasons given above, not ultimately persuasive. The progressive nature of sex. Sexual activity progresses as by a one-way ratchet; once parties achieve consummation, they cannot retreat from that point. In an established relationship, parties who have had sex but subsequently attempt to desist will find this reverter nearly impossible.
Parties who are friends, or who scarcely know one another, will find that sexual intercourse irrevocably alters their dealings. Because the act of sexual intercourse is both significant and irreversible, it is easier both to end a relationship altogether, and to maintain a friendship with a former interest, if sexual intercourse never takes place. G and Q, friends for many years, find themselves having sex one night. Thereafter, though they try to maintain their former friendship, they no longer enjoy their once-easy rapport.
Each is now preoccupied by his or her own expectations, and is concerned as well about the other's expectations. One of the most common sources of dissatisfaction pursuant to sexual intercourse is the failure of a party to know his or her goal ab initio.
Most people have fully formulated their own standards and practices in sexual relations. However, at the very moment that the opportunity arises to put these values to the test, conflicting impulses may emerge. Caught up with the purported spontaneity of sex and nearly irresistible hedonistic urges, a party may feel inclined to disregard previously honed beliefs.
The justifications for such abandonment of principle track those for homicide. Desire clouded my judgment. Sometimes you have to throw caution to the wind.
Because of the easy availability of facile justifications, parties should examine with care their motives--i. N returns home for Thanksgiving weekend and at a party meets T, whom N dated briefly in high school. Although N does not want to establish a new relationship with T, N becomes increasingly interested in a one-night stand as the evening progresses.
N decides to have sex with T, but harbors no expectations besides sexual gratification. After their night together, N returns to school. Because N had not wanted the encounter to amount to anything more than a pleasurable interlude, N returned to school free from the burdens of expectation. Formulating one's sexual goals is similar to structuring a transaction.
Just as a single business deal can be arranged as either a sale-leaseback or mortgage financing to achieve different tax consequences, the same physical act may carry different implications depending on how individuals characterize it.
Such self-deceit may result in unfortunate consequences. Q has only had sex with people whom Q loved. Now, though not in love with anyone, Q wants to have some sexual relief, and R, whom Q has dated a few times, seems suitable. Q decides that, despite Q's established values of viewing sex as "different," sex with R would be appropriate even in the absence of love.
After Q and R have sex, Q feels anxious and upset about the casualness of the encounter. Q's ex ante characterization offers little comfort post hoc. The above illustrations reflect the human proclivity with which law must constantly reckon: Such efforts are doomed to failure. In the corporate arena, for example, the "limited liability corporation" has recently met with excessive enthusiasm. This new entity purports to combine the limited-liability benefits of a corporation with the tax benefits of a partnership arrangement.
The know-your-goal rule has different applications depending on the parties' status. Sex within an established relationship. The most common context for sexual intercourse is between two parties to an established relationship.
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While sexual intercourse is commonly considered a medium by which the parties advance the relationship, this perception is false; sexual intercourse merely reflects the bona fides of the relationship. Sex cannot remedy or compensate for the weaknesses in a flawed relationship, nor can it be used to circumvent the laborious process of establishing emotional intimacy.
B and C have a good and loving relationship. While B eagerly anticipated sexual intercourse with C, B feared that sex might change things. However, after consummation, their previous feelings and behavior toward each other continued unaffected. Sex simply mirrored B and C's well-established intimacy. Platonic friends will, on occasion, engage in sexual intercourse.
This situation inevitably presents the parties with a steep challenge to "know their goal. There are a few reported cases in which friends who have had sex remain friends; however, parties anxious to proceed should not rely on outliers. Few friendships can withstand the transition from friend to sexual partner, and back again. The one-night stand is perceived as the most promising means to costless, casual sex. In many instances, it fulfills that purpose.
However, parties may find themselves dissatisfied or despondent, despite the expectation of an easy time. First, parties who considered the episode an isolated event may feel disconcerted if they subsequently come into contact with each other, for example, at work or in school.
Initiation of Sexual Intercourse 1 Women bear the ultimate burden of securing contraception. In matters of contraception, the woman is traditionally viewed as the least cost avoider, because the costs of pregnancy bear more heavily on her. This substantive difference tracks procedural burden-shifting rules.
However, to demonstrate his good faith, the man has the burden of coming forward to address the issue. In matters of protection from disease, parties are cautioned against making assumptions about the sexual history of other parties.
After having sex for the first time, two parties must confront the issue of whether literally, physically, to spend the night together. Circuits are sharply split on the advisability of staying over. Some hold that one party's departure in the middle of the night allows the parties to extend the romantic fantasy--free from stale breath, mussed hair, and other morning realities--and, more importantly, to retain autonomy at a critical juncture. These circuits emphasize that spending the night can be more intimate then sex itself and does not necessarily follow from sex.
Other circuits hold that a significant part of the pleasure--shared breakfast and daylight repetition of the previous evening's activities--would be lost if the parties separated before morning. They contend further that sex creates an expectation of a level of intimacy that warrants at least a full night's stay. Because reasonable minds disagree so strongly on the issue of spending the night, the Reporters cannot responsibly advocate one position. Rather, the Restatement cautions that a party initially taken aback by another's approach should recognize that both methods enjoy ample support in the caselaw.
D and F have sex for the first time. Long before morning, D awakens to find F dressing to leave. D looks on feeling shocked, disappointed, and rejected.
D should take comfort in the fact that F's method, while perplexing to D, is considered objectively reasonable by some circuits. While additional benefits may be granted, the following benefits are guaranteed.
The healthy party must also discharge any necessary chores until the other's recovery. L gets up in the middle of the night and finishes P's carton of ice cream. P cannot reasonably seek compensation or replacement. J lives next door to a hardware store. H, whose kitchen lightbulb has burned out, asks J to pick up a lightbulb on the way over to H's apartment.
J cannot reasonably refuse to perform this minimal service. Maxims of Equity The maxims of equity trace their history back to the very roots of the common law, and they distill into a few simple yet profound phrases the fundamentals of a principled system of justice. Equity regards substance rather than form. The putative indicators of sexual prowess, such as big ears, big hands, and sophisticated techniques, are unreliable as well as inconsistent.
It is the substance of a sexual encounter, including the degree of effort one makes to satisfy a partner, rather than any predetermined forms, that determines the likelihood of ultimate, mutual satisfaction.
Equity presumes no right to be without a remedy.
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When engaging in sexual intercourse, each party should disclose his or her needs and desires to the other party when necessary. The practice of certain acts may dramatically increase the probability of mutual satisfactory resolution, but parties cannot be expected to employ all available measures without some guidance.
One party should not be expected consistently to assume the "laboring oar" in sexual initiation and energy. Sexual relations benefit when both parties play a role in facilitation. Equity delights to do justice, and that not by halves. Once a party initiates sexual activity, that party must, in good faith, undertake all reasonable efforts to allow the other party to reach satisfaction.
Equity regards that as done which ought to be done. The withholding of sexual intercourse as a tactic of argument the so-called Lysistrata strategy is highly disfavored. Parties are counselled not to use sexual intercourse as a weapon, particularly where the issue at bar is unrelated to the act. Equity favors the vigilant, not those who sleep on their rights. Although no party should feel obliged to have sex against a strong disinclination, the presumption lies in favor of sexual intercourse for parties in a sexual relationship.
The reason is two-fold: Equity bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Because of the vulnerability that necessarily accompanies sexual relations, parties should afford one another tolerance, understanding and empathy.
He who seeks equity must do equity. A party must strive to satisfy a sexual partner as well as to seek satisfaction for himself or herself. Equity will not aid a wrongdoer. An unfeeling party who criticizes the other party for failure to become sexually excited will not enjoy improved sexual relations. The critic only exacerbates the situation by making the other party feel inadequate or self-conscious. Equity follows the law. As set forth in this Restatement. It provides guidance in the decision to break up, the litigation of the breakup, and behavior after the breakup.
The Decision To Dissolve Parties should consult precedent in evaluating a relationship's future. In evaluating precedent, however, parties must take care to avoid excessive reliance on outliers. When deciding whether to end a relationship, parties may wish to consult the wealth of precedent generated by the experiences of similarly situated friends. When consulting precedent, parties should take into account factors that may distinguish their cases.
Differences in religion, ethnicity, race, age, or regional background may lead to very different outcomes in apparently similar cases. Whether the parties are in school or out of school may also have important consequences. F considers breaking off a relationship with K because F believes K is not ambitious enough.
F should consult prior cases concerning diverse topics such as: In examining precedent, parties are often tempted to continue research until they find an "outlier" case that supports the desired outcome.
Such efforts are highly disfavored. The very fact that a party must search for an outlier demonstrates that the desired outcome is contrary to the common experiences of the age.
D begins to date L but feels unenthusiastic. D continues to date L for months, hoping that passion will spark. Throughout this period, D consults with friends, seeking precedent to legitimate D's hope that the relationship can gain momentum. D grasps for an outlier to support this behavior.
Instead, D should recognize the well-established principle: An entire line of cases is dedicated to the special problems of long-distance relationships.
No party should end a long-distance relationship without consulting this well-developed body of doctrine, which considers heavily litigated issues such as: Motions for Dissolution Once a party has decided that a breakup is warranted, that party should promptly move for dissolution.
In initiating dissolution proceedings, the movant should assert grounds honestly. Extreme tactics such as constructive eviction are highly disfavored.
It is common for the moving party to justify the proposed dissolution on several grounds, both procedural and substantive. Procedural grounds may include: Y wants to break up with Z. Y claims the ground of timing, saying, "I'm just not ready for a serious relationship," to avoid acknowledging that Y is simply not interested in pursuing this relationship.
Constructive eviction is a common tactic employed by moving parties who wish to dissolve a relationship, but who lack the wherewithal to articulate any ground at all, even pretextual.
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Rather than confront the anguish of breaking up, the disaffected party engages in conduct so unbearable that the opposing party finds the relationship uninhabitable. Such behavior often involves picking fights, refusing to return phone calls, breaking plans regularly, and conspicuously avoiding public appearances as a couple. The opposing party feels forced by the moving party's behavior to initiate the breakup.
This is a form of fraud by the moving party and is highly disfavored. Constructive eviction includes a subclass of cases that undergo "reversal. The evictee may, at this point, feel tempted to stay in the relationship. Generally, however, reversal is merely a temporary change of heart that occurs when a previously abusive party faces the prospect of a loss.
Evictees should be wary of the sincerity of such sudden reversals in attitude. Defenses Available to Opposing Party Regardless of the grounds invoked by the moving party, an opposing party is always entitled to plead the merits of his or her case.
Parties may also seek notice to cure defects, or in extreme cases, attempt a leveraged buyout of the moving party's affections. Rights of opposing party. When the moving party offers procedural grounds for a breakup, the opposing party often holds out the hope that an appropriate defense will circumvent dissolution. An opposing party often will argue that the substantive merits of the case outweigh any procedural concerns the moving party may have. Such defenses, however, are invariably unavailing.
A moving party intent on dissolving a relationship will ultimately prevail, no matter how forcefully the opposing party states the case. Nevertheless, exercise of defenses by an opposing party is not futile. T moves to break up with L, on the grounds that their long-distance relationship is too difficult to maintain.
In defense, L offers to move to T's city to remedy the situation. Faced with the prospect of L's move, T drops the pretext of long distance, and reaches the merits: However, I think 3G internet is completely unnecessary. Both eReaders allow you to connect to the internet via WiFi, so as long as you are in your home or somewhere with wifi, you can download as many books as you think you will need for your trip. But my own distaste aside, if you do need 3G that badly, go with the Kindle 3G.
Renting books on the devices Each device comes with its own way to rent books, but neither is really all that useful when it comes down to it. With the Nook, if you bring it to a Barnes and Nobles store, you are able to use their wi-fi which you can always do anyway, even on a laptop and you can read any book in their Nook collection for one hour per day. If you happen to be an Amazon Prime customer, you can borrow any one Kindle book per month for free. You get one borrow per calendar month with no rollovers, and you can keep the book as long as you want.
For a while I thought this would be great for me, because my mom has an Amazon Prime account and I am linked to her account through my own, so I sort of have a secondary Prime membership. After doing a lot of research to figure out if I could use the Kindle Owners Lending Library, I came up empty-handed and without an answer.
I concluded that it would be very unlikely that this service would be extended to me on a secondary linked account. For extra features, like Nook GlowLight and Kindle 3G, or Kindle without ads, you end up paying a bit extra, but if it is a feature you want than it is worth the investment for either device. Free Sample Chapters On either device, you can download a free sample before you commit to buy. I like this feature a lot. One of the things I would have missed about picking books in-store is turning to a random page and reading it to see if I like the style of writing.
With free samples, you can still look a little bit into the book before actually buying it. Of course there are many more differences between the Nook and Kindle, but none that really mean much to me.
The function of an eReader is to allow people to read books in any lighting, on the go, and both the Nook and the Kindle can do that well. There are plenty of ways to get them for free. So choose based on the little perks that you like, like the glow light or wifi or how cool you think the device looks. How to Get Books for Free And now the fun part.
Well start with most well-known methods and build up to expert mode. Lending with Amazon and Barnes and Noble As I mentioned before, each device has its own little lending program. So you can read books for an hour in-store with a Nook, or borrow one book per month with a Kindle. Alright, not too useful. Books include classics that have no copyright, such as Pride and Prejudice, Frankenstein, and Alice and Wonderland.
Often new authors release their eBooks for free in order to get you hooked. They might give away the first book in a series and have you pay for the next ones. Or, they might offer a bunch of different books for free in order to build a name for themselves, and eventually write books for a profit. But Amazon seems to have a bigger selection of these kinds of books, because authors who self-plublish books which is free to the author tend to put their books in Amazon Kindle format more often than Barnes and Noble Nook format.
Search Barnes and Noble and Amazons free eBooks. You can also find free Classics on each site. I was very excited when I found this out, and I dont know why it isnt more well-known. But you can borrow eBooks from your public library in much the same way you would borrow physical books from them.